Originally published in the Grand Rapids Business Journal, May 9, 2005.

It was early in our marriage, still in the mobile home, and I was attempting to fix something. I don't remember exactly what, but it required the use of a drill. And while I had the good fortune of owning a drill, the key for tightening the chuck and securing the drill bit was missing.

Now this sort of situation was stressful enough for me -- even without the complication of a missing part. I have no natural fix-it skills, and at that point I didn't have a whole lot of experience. Understand that I like the physical work, and I'm pretty good at following directions. It's just that with any home repair project, especially back then, there is a huge fear of the unknown. What if I get in over my head? What if I screw this up? And this exasperated by the gnawing thought of: as a man -- as a *real* man -- I should be able to fix anything.

Insecure and agitated, I at last found the key. It had fallen through a small hole and into the plastic case for the drill. I was alternating between jamming my finger through the sharp edges coaxing the key out and violently shaking the case when Jane happened by. She saw what I was doing and said this: "You know my Dad always ties that key thing to the drill's cord -- that way he never loses it." I said nothing. I just sat there and let the smoke billow from my ears. It was the only time in my life that I can honestly say that I hated my father-in-law. And it wasn't his fault.

Nobody likes advice -- even if it's good advice -- when they elbow deep in fix-it work. The board at the Grand Rapids public schools (like pretty much every other public school board these days) has been diligently and desperately trying to come up with the budget for the next school year. All the easy stuff has been cut already. They have come around to privatizing the bus service and are considering doing the same for custodians. It's painful, difficult work, and they are a long way from being done.

So it was against this backdrop that millionaire businessman and likely 2006 Republican gubernatorial candidate Dick DeVos decided to send a personal congratulations to superintendent Bert Bleke. "Huzzah! Huzzah for the glory of privatizing those tax-dollar sucking public servants!" is basically what it said. The Democratic governor Jennifer Granholm then felt compelled to pass her own judgment. "Shame! Shame for defiling what is sacred and pure!" is pretty much what she said. Is "patronizing" the right word or "sanctimonious"? I couldn't decide which, so I drew the comic.